Truth: I’m not a social mama. I don’t have playdates scheduled weeks in advance, Nix doesn’t have a massive gang of toddler mates, we don’t do coffees at the mall, go to baby gym or playgroup. This suits me just fine but if I’m honest, it’s not the best for Nixon. It’s pretty easy for me to get very caught up in the ‘routine’, the chores, Ethan’s big kid stuff and my self-imposed blog deadlines (I work every nap time and every night once the kids go to bed until around 11.30). Nix is anything but mellow, but if we’re talking second child stereotypes, then I have to say, he’s getting a bit of a raw deal at the moment.
Cool your jets for a second. He’s not ‘neglected’ in any way, I just haven’t been going out of my way to plan many, ok, any Nixie-specific activities or outings during the week. Enter all the mummy-guilt feels.
So this morning I did something I should have done a long time ago. Nixon and I went to Mainly Music. It sounds like no big thing right? Ethan and I attended our local Mainly Music religiously every week for three years when he was a pre-schooler. I loved it. He loved it and we made best friends with a Mummy/Daughter duo whom I still love dearly to this day. So I have very fond memories of my virgin outing at MM all those years ago.
Last year Nix and I headed off to our local chapter and I was so disappointed. It wasn’t at all as I remembered, the Mums weren’t really in to it, the leader wasn’t really in to it and I left just feeling awkward and vowing never to return. Well, that’s the end of that I thought.
But with spirits bolstered, I set off this morning to a different suburban church, full of resolve and a smile on my dial, ready to do the damn thing.
And. It was awesome. Nix and I both had a great time, the Mums and kids there seemed friendly, fun and welcoming.
I saw you, Mum-with-the-wet-hair, who had just managed to scramble out of the shower and into the car. I waved at you (in my head) and thought, that will be me 9/10 times I go, because who has time for a blow dry right? I saw you, Mum-on-your-phone, and thought how nice it was that you could just sit and relax for 5 minutes in PEACE while your kid was super happy and playing with one of the church Nana’s blowing bubbles. I smiled at you (in my head) and thought, I know how you feel, those chairs look super comfy, one day I’ll join you and we can quietly play Candy Crush side-by-side in an unspoken gesture of solidarity against being up our kids asses 24-7. “Let them play!” we’ll say. And we might be friends. I hope.
I’m going back dammit. I’m going to go to Mainly Music every week, and I’m going to shake my sillies out, sing Skinnimarinkidinkydink, march like a majorette and I’m going to make friends with Mum-with-the-wet-hair and Mum-on-her-phone, they won’t even see it coming………………..HELLO, HI? I’M MELISSA!!